Self Driving Inc

Hello,

Could anyone turn this story into an AI SLOP FEST?

I would love to offer to pay you. Not going to happen unless I can sell this story then I don't pay someone, whoever buys it from me pays someone to do it. 

Whoever does it, could be you, gets to say that they got paid to do an AI slop fest! Paid by someone because whoever simply asked them if they wanted money to make the video and that it wouldn't happen, but it wasn't true! Someone does get paid (is how I predict a possible future for this story) paid to do it! They do it for anyone who paid.

...or not, you can make it whatever way you decide. Make it more than what it is! Add yourself into it? or not! chop it up! Retell it anyway that works for you but make it a video.  I may still do it myself, but not any time soon.

Hello!

Are you tired of your old self driving feature not meeting your expectations? That's what I thought. I'm sure you could tell me all kinds of storys about how your self-driving feature had disappointed you or maybe even cause you to go PFFFF or something worse. 

 Well.....those days over! 

 Let me introduce myself. My name is Self. Nice to meet you. I know you have a lot invested your car and you love it all except for the self-driving feature from the factory. That where I step in! Me (Self) and my company Self Driving Inc. can offer a better solution at an affordable price. We can take cash, credit cards, good trades for that customer who doesn't even have a bank account, and we also will take monthly direct payment from a bank account. No contracts (unless you want one), no hidden fees, no BS. Self-Driving Inc is aspiring startup business with an... or not! Are you. interested? 

 I thought so. I'll get straight to it. Self-Driving Inc will replace your cars Self Driving feature. It's as simple as me, Self, integrating a costume electronic controller that allows you to turn the self-driving feature on and off just like normal. Here is a peak inside the black box... 

When you turn on your cars Self Driving Inc feature. The controller transmits the signal to me, Self. The controller in your car is connected to my hacked Nintendo steering wheel, shifter and gas/brake pedal and the 124 inch flat screen on the well in my bedroom. When you call for Self-Driving Inc, I get out of bed get into the driver's seat. I take control of your cars electronic driving system from my bedroom and steer you around while you work or sleep or do whatever or whatever's.... 

Self-Driving Inc is dynamic because sometimes I'm not available, but you will never know the difference because my dog can drive the Nintendo steering wheel as good or better than most people can actually drive a real car, so he takes over for me. Sometime my dog isn't available, so I have the 10-year-old neighbor kid who loaned me the Nintendo steering wheel set, and he is a PRO with it so between the three of us.... we got you covered. 

 I know what you are asking yourself right now. HOW COULD IT BE ANY BETTER!? RIGHT? I'll let you know when that happens but there is a list of impossible things like time travel and coming back from the dead AND now the newest thing on the list is that it IS impossible to make this deal for a new and improved Self Driving feature any better...at least for right this very minute. one minute later. 

 It does get better! The next-door neighbor found a bunch of old abandoned Nintendo steering wheel sets in the back of some game depot store. The details aren't clear but what is clear is that my neighbor doesn't know how to connect those parts to your EV like I do! 

You are asking yourself, how does this make the new improved Self Driving Inc deal even better? It makes it better because you...and I mean NOT ME... YOU CAN DRIVE FOR Self-Driving Inc TOO! THAT IS AMAZING! SO... Instead of paying me and my dog, I will send you the Nintendo Steering Wheel set and the EV controller and I will even try to find a "customer" for you to install the system in. Then instead of getting payment from me Self at Self Driving Inc, you drive for that person, they pay you, I drive for you, and you pay me. That way everyone is getting paid, and you don't really work for me because whoever you are driving for is paying. That's it. Ok. That's my business video game idea.